Double Mind

I pursue you with a double mind,
But with a single brain.
Though my intentions be true and fine,
My purpose's split in twain. 

 

For if I my present loneliness avow,
Do I thus my hitherto-lived years disdain?
And hate my life before I met you,
Each of its days having been lived in vain? 

 

Next to the hope of enduring ador,
I esteem lowly the confusèd days of youth;
But shall I choose my former self to martyr,
If you be not the queen of my heart forsooth? 

 

So then pursue you I ever with divided spirit,
But lest I succeed my will to unify, how can I ever conquer it? 

 

-- April 2, 1991 copyright © 1991, 2005